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Crying during meeting
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Crying during meeting
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One of my subordinates cried very hard today in my office. We had a disagreement on the proper approach to an effort.
According to my wife, she believe this employee...female is frustrated because
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Forums » Topic Forums » General Forum » Crying during meeting
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Crying during meeting
posted at 12/1/2009 5:11 AM EST
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Posts: 2
First: 10/21/2008 Last: 12/1/2009 |
Having been on the crying end of a similar situation, I can say that a couple of previous comments really ring true for me. One is that there may indeed have been more going on underneath what you saw, and your specific interaction on that day was simply a trigger. Another is that it's important to consider how your message came across. In my case it was the person's managerial style that was the real problem, more so than anything he said. His particular comment on that particular day wasn't in itself enough to make me cry, but it was sort of the straw that broke the camel's back.
If you value this person in your organization, you may want to create some sort of safe way for her to voice whatever frustration or anger it was that had built up, because it may reveal a deeper problem that needs to be addressed. In my case I was about ready to walk out the door. Luckily someone recognized that, I switched jobs in the organization, and everything worked out well in the end. |
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Crying during meeting
posted at 12/1/2009 5:30 AM EST
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Posts: 1
First: 12/1/2009 Last: 12/1/2009 |
Assuming there are no non-work factors contributing to the situation and this behavior is not part of an ongoing pattern...
If a "disagreement" leads to a level of frustration that evokes what seems to be an extreme response, this may be a signal that problems have been building for awhile. As manager, you may have inadvertently created a negative environment where the employee feels that positive communication is just not possible. Another poster suggested referring the employee to EAP which is a good suggestion. It couldn't hurt for you to explore this option as well. Talking with a disinterested, third party may help you to examine the situation in a balanced manner and determine how you can improve your approach to difficult communications. |
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Crying during meeting
posted at 12/1/2009 6:40 AM EST
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Posts: 2
First: 12/6/2003 Last: 12/1/2009 |
Both parties need to be in the dialogue 100%. I don't believe in a 50% your responsibility - 50% their responsibility. Have you taken the time to develop an understanding of where the other is coming from? Is your communication respectful? That is, do you take ownership of yourself and your emotions? Or are you a "you" person? The whole "calling her out," didn't come across as very constructive.
I don't think crying is a bad thing (maybe not the greatest), but it should indicate to you 1) either something else is going on or 2) that there are a lot of emotions around the topic of discussion. As participants in the dialogue, it is up to you and your coworker to create a deeper pool of understanding in order to find a "proper approach" that you can both live with. Don't assume anything! |
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Crying during meeting
posted at 12/1/2009 7:11 AM EST
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Posts: 1
First: 12/1/2009 Last: 12/1/2009 |
This is always an unfortunate situation but I'm very familiar with it. Not only have I experienced this breakdown with my associates but I've been on the "crying side" too. In my case I tend to tear up and choke up when I'm angry. It has been perceived as a manipulative device and as a defense mechanism and as a sign of weakness...all not the case. So, I recommend that when this type of reaction occurs the manager needs to quickly interrupt the meeting and call for a composure break and set a time to get back together to continue. When the parties are reconvened and everyone is calmer get the issue resolved and if there's an opening or receptivity to it--ask, "Can you help me understand your reaction? Was it from anger, frustration, hurt or something else? Letting the person express herself about the reaction can go a long way to understanding and to establishing respect for future interactions. |
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Crying during meeting
posted at 12/1/2009 9:45 AM EST
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Posts: 155
First: 8/24/2009 Last: 2/9/2010 |
In my expereince the best way to handle a "crying in the workplace" situation is to simply inform the crier to "go and collect themselves" and then continue the conversation afterwards.
It requires no other reaction than that. |
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Crying during meeting
posted at 12/3/2009 7:27 AM EST
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Posts: 1
First: 12/3/2009 Last: 12/3/2009 |
First and foremost. How well do you know this person. If you know this is something that is common, I would not take it as seriously. If it's a rare accurance. I say tread lightly. First the tears then the explosion. Get your HR rep involved this may evolve into something ugly. |
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Crying during meeting
posted at 1/22/2010 10:37 PM EST
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Posts: 14
First: 9/10/2004 Last: 4/16/2010 |
What talking to crying people, I recommend:
1- Suggest stopping the conversation and getting back later. The crying person might lack logical thinking at those moments and even you can incluenced by that. 2- Try to maintain your balance login even if you feel sorry or want to show sympathy. 3- Try to have a third party involved and better be someone who is good in communication and honest about things. 4- Consider timing and setting up the location of the meeting/discussion. Thanks |
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Crying during meeting
posted at 1/23/2010 6:48 AM EST
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Posts: 562
First: 11/12/2009 Last: 9/14/2011 |
You stand in front of your desk, raise up one foot and try to maintain your balance while you're logging in on your computer. Style points are awarded for grace - jerky movements are penalized and, of course, falling on your butt means an instantaneous disqualification. Extra points are awarded for length and complexity of the password and user name.
There's a petition on front of the Olympic Committe to make this a summer olympics sport for both individual and team competition (synchronized balance login) to go with all the other ridiculous sports that have been added. As you might expect, the Chinese have the #1 Balance Login team in the world. However, there have been complaints that several members are underage which China refuses to comment on. |
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