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Boss Behavior
Discuss employment-law issues such as family leave, overtime, disabilities law, harassment, immigration and termination.
I had a former employee call me about the boss that took my place. She said that he is harassing her terribly & she is now out on mental stress leave because of it. She told me that he pulled her
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Forums » Topic Forums » Legal Forum » Boss Behavior
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Boss Behavior
posted at 11/24/2010 8:05 AM EST
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Posts: 210
First: 1/4/2003 Last: 7/11/2011 |
Ok - wow - can't believe I read all that!
Debra - just a note on your note to me. You mentioned that no matter how impartial an HR person is they may not be perceived that way. It's not an HR person's job to be impartial. It's our job to look out for the business. It's our responsibility to do so in an ethical manner. I am NOT impartial when I address an employee relations issue, I am on the side of what is best for the health of my company, and that may not be resolving a conflict between two people so they can feel happy about it. And - what was his name - deltac I think? I said you would be taken more seriously without throwing out statistics. You say you have research to back them up -- to that I say I am sure if we google hard enough we can find statistics and research to support pretty much any finding. Quoting statistics just doesn't lend credibility. As for the rest - I'm with HRPRO. |
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Boss Behavior
posted at 11/24/2010 8:49 AM EST
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Posts: 544
First: 9/27/2004 Last: 9/13/2011 |
nope, it wasn't me. I admit that I do spend a lot of time studying organizational research because it is a big part of my role in HR, but I'm not the one who said it here.
I will tell you that most, if not all, of the outcomes and statistics reported are the ones we would expect, human behavior is not rocket science. I can sum up all of it in one sentence "Do unto others and stop being such a jerk, there's too much work to do!" |
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Boss Behavior
posted at 11/24/2010 9:07 AM EST
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Posts: 1771
First: 10/24/2002 Last: 9/14/2011 |
While I agree that the current hoopla about bullying in the workplace is a bit OTT, I disagree wholeheartedly that bullying never happens. I was bullied for about a year and wound up under a doctor's care and on stress meds. At the time, I didn't recognize it for what it was because hey - I'm in HR! Which means I'm bulletproof! And the man doing it was an executive! A professional! He had an MBA! Executive-level professional MBAs don't act like this! I must be imagining it! Because after all, just like the executive-level professional MBA man kept telling me, I'm just a fat, lazy, dumb broad (his exact words, over and over). So if there's a problem, it must be my fault, right? So if I feel horrible and sick all the time, and I can't sleep at night, and I can't eat, and I cry every day on the bus home, and I can't tell my husband why I spend every weekend staring at the living room wall for hours on end, well, that's just my cross to bear because I'm such a retard (one of the bully's favourite words) - right?
Anyway, it took about four months of leave, some therapy, more than a few pills, and the kind support of several colleagues who were reluctant and terrified witnesses to the bullying before I could bring myself to believe that: 1) I was definitely being bullied, and 2) it wasn't my fault. So while I agree that maybe there's not as much bullying going on as some people say there is, I also know for a fact that workplace bullying does happen, and when it does, it is sheer and utter hell for the person being bullied. |
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Boss Behavior
posted at 11/24/2010 9:47 AM EST
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Posts: 32
First: 11/16/2010 Last: 1/3/2011 |
Hi, janimal -
Thanks for your response. I agree that it's an HR person's job to look out for the business. I think you'd agree that having healthy, productive employees is key to your business's bottom line. Therefore, creating an "us against them" mentality - a culture in which employees feel unsupported or unheard - is not likely going to create the environment required for optimum profitability. Addressing disputes can never guarantee that it will result in "resolving a conflict between two people so they can feel happy about it." It may mean coming to terms with a situation that just isn't working and is not likely to work in the future. However, the willingness to see a situation from an employee's perspective (suspending judgment, checking one's assumptions)can make make a huge difference in terms of the time, cost and headaches it takes to get to that point. So, in my mind, attempting to be impartial (seeing all sides of a situation without making premature assumptions)is looking out for your business. Hope I'm making some sort of sense - even if even you don't agree with me...I took the day off to clean and the fumes may be getting to me. (smile) Take care and Happy Thanksgiving! Debra |
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Boss Behavior
posted at 11/24/2010 9:57 AM EST
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Posts: 32
First: 11/16/2010 Last: 1/3/2011 |
Hi, hrbth -
I'm sorry to hear about your experience, but am so glad you had supportive colleagues and were able to take some time off to get back on your feet. It's such a bizarre feeling when you're in that kind of a situation - especially when you've become accustomed to being considered a "model employee." You begin questioning everything about yourself. Self-confidence, self-esteem and self-efficacy dissipate and you begin wondering how you've ever gotten anywhere in your life. Congratulations for all your success! Happy Thanksgiving. Debra |
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Boss Behavior
posted at 11/24/2010 10:07 AM EST
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Posts: 29
First: 6/9/2009 Last: 4/26/2011 |
This thread hits home for me because of 30 years of HR and 90 hours of dispute-resolution training and a âwhole lot moreâ on dispute-resolution process design. Moreover, as nork4 points out, HR has seen a bunch of fads. I would agree bullying is but one more.
Regarding the bullying, Iâm more likely to believe what HRPro points out. My, opinion however, in the context of bullying, is that we have more problem employees than problems with bullying. Whether performance issues, personal/family problems, or, social issues â HR is a magnet where employees seek resolution. Most of us who have been in the business for a very long time are not saying âthatâs the way it is,â were only experienced enough to know when and how to recognize that bullying is more likely to be another excuse for poor performance or poor manager/employee communication. In and of itself, we canât use another expert. We need a mature (not necessarily older) workforce, capable of listening/accepting feedback, and a willingness to understand how passion about our jobs drives us. We need managers who deal effectively with inappropriate behavior. We need honesty so employees trusts HR. And we need a lot more âstuff,â but thatâs it for this post. just my $.02 HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL |
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Boss Behavior
posted at 11/24/2010 11:13 AM EST
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Posts: 6
First: 11/18/2010 Last: 11/24/2010 |
Hi all,
I am really appreciative of this thread. I'm enjoying the conversation and am learning a lot about the points of views of experienced HR professionals and where the resistance to jumping on the "bullying bandwagon" comes from. So thank you. It was me who pointed out that there is a lot of research that supports bullying does exist. Before you dismiss this research I speak of as just a fad, I will just say this, and then you can take it or leave it: The research on the topic of workplace bullying dates back 25 years to Leymann, a researcher in Sweden. The research has continued to grow worldwide, and spans across the fields of organizational psychology, business management, communication, psychology, social psychology, etc. The research is conducted by respected PhD's and consultants in their fields, holding tenure at respected universities and consulting firms, and published in peer-reviewed social scientific journals. There are literally THOUSANDS of published journal articles from HUNDREDS of researchers. So when you dismiss bullying as non-existant, you dismiss a TON of systematic and scientific research that says otherwise. You may have never seen it happen in your organization, but that doesn't mean it's not out there. And please consider that you may have seen it along the way, but didn't realize it. That being said, again HRPro you have enlightened me. I can see how after X years in HR you've seen a lot of fads come and go, and something like bullying would just seem like one more. Argh! I certainly don't think every company out there should run out and spend dollars on training, consulting, policies, and Kumbaya posters because bullying is taking over the world. All I can ask for is that companies do pay attention to how people treat each other because they know that internal healthy relationships are healthy for the bottom line and external customer relationships. Same goes for diversity, sexual harassment, the standard dealing with difficult people training, interpersonal skills training, etc. Really, all of those topics, collectively, help people within an organization maintain respect for each other and a collaborative attitude. While we can't quantify how much a company saves if they put managers through these trainings, I think we can still agree that when implemented correctly these programs are helpful to the bottom line anyway. I would also hope that in a situation like what the OP is talking about, that instead of just automatically taking the manager's side and approaching the employee to address the attitude problem, that you would give the employee a bit of the benefit of the doubt and hear the employee's side of it too. You might be right (the employee needs an attitude adjustment) but in the chance that I might be right (the manager looks good on paper with education and experience but in reality lacks interpersonal communication skills, or leadership skills), then having taken the time to learn more about the situation could save time and money in lost production from the employee and the other people in the department. Further, if the employee in the OP is having an attitude problem, it sounds like the manager in all of her wisdom is not addressing it effectively... perhaps this manager is still lacking management skills even if she's not bullying the employee. Perhaps HR would need to step in to ensure the problem can be resolved quickly so everyone can just get back to being productive??? |
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Boss Behavior
posted at 11/24/2010 3:22 PM EST
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Posts: 562
First: 11/12/2009 Last: 9/14/2011 |
I'm sure there's a lot of research out there on bullying. You can probably find a lot of research on a whole lot of topics that will support a wide variety of viewpoints. Some might actually be relevant.
I would submit that academia and real world management are two entirely different things. The former often sounds very good, but has very little real relevance, application or value in an operational environment. Diversity would undoubtedly be one of those - after years of academic bleating and self promotion, diversity programs never lived up to their billing and produced virtually nothing of any value. Academics would be well advised to experience real world management and workplace interrelationships. Then they can retreat to their hallowed halls to develop theories that might, after being validated in the real world, prove to be of some value. Hint: Never, ever start off using academic studies and research to make your argument. Crusty old pragmatists like HRPro and myself will immediately tune out, if not walk out. If you want to make an argument, tell how much "bullying" is costing my business and how I can cost effectively remedy the situation. Until you can make your argument using objective measures and not wishy washy "wouldn't it be nice if" positions, you present no real value. We don't need academic hand-wringing. |
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